


What a Difference a Year Makes

by jstabe



Category: Jossverse
Genre: M/M, Season/Series 04
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-10-29
Updated: 2004-10-29
Packaged: 2017-10-29 13:05:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,271
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/320218
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jstabe/pseuds/jstabe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><i>He’d known what today was when he’d woken up.  Could hardly forget now could he?</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	What a Difference a Year Makes

**Author's Note:**

> Anya never came back after season 3 and Spike never left Xander’s basement.

Spike sat and stared out the window, waiting for Xander to come home. He was absolutely still and that in itself was strange. He was also contemplative, which would worry him if anyone were around to see. He’d known what today was when he’d woken up. Could hardly forget now could he? Even though demons don’t pay attention to calendars. When you’re going to live forever why bother marking time? But he’d known and it put him in a strange mood. He should be angry and sometimes he still was. Angry that they had taken him and violated him by shoving this _thing_ in his brain. It had taken a while, but he was also kind of glad. Because the chip made him stop and look around for the first time in a century, he noticed things he hadn’t before. And wonder of wonders he liked most of what he found. He could still hurt demons so he wasn’t utterly useless, he could still drink human blood; it just came in bags now, and he found himself liking people. Oh not all of them. But humans were fascinating to watch. The Scoobies more so than most. You could do just about anything you wanted to them and they still came out swinging. Still came out family. Their bond was unshakable. He knew that for a fact. He found himself liking them almost against his will.

But the most amazing thing that had happened in this strange long year of being chipped was that he started noticing Xander. He found himself admiring the man’s sense of loyalty, the way he never let his girls down, the way he fought for no reason except that it was the right thing to do. He was the glue that held the Scoobies together and Spike wondered if he even knew it. Living in Xander’s basement had shown him glimpses of the man’s life he’d never had before. He’d found himself reluctantly admiring the fact that Xander could be so cheerful and so good considering the hell he lived in. Living in such close quarters had also made Spike realize something else. Xander was gorgeous.

He remembered the first time he’d looked at Xander and seen an attractive person rather than an annoying sort-of-friend. They’d been at the Magic Box researching some obscure thing or other. Spike had come in through the back after finishing a smoke. Someone had apparently just said something funny because Xander had thrown back his head and laughed a pure belly laugh. He’d turned to Spike with that goofy Xander-grin still on his face and Spike was in instant lust. It had stopped Spike dead in his tracks. He’d never looked at Xander that way before. Why now? Xander and sexy weren’t words that had ever existed together in Spike’s mind before. From that day on he couldn’t help but notice every little thing about Xander. The way his hair curled slightly at the ends when he wore it longer, the way his eyes got warm and crinkled at the corners when he smiled, the way construction work toned him and made him lean and hard. The fact that he loved to laze around on Saturday mornings and watch cartoons, how he loved sci-fi and horror movies, that he had a secret passion for hokey movies-of the-week. Spike wanted so badly to make a move, any kind of move, but every time he thought about it he could only imagine two ways for it to go. Xander would either look at him with disgusted horror or he’d laugh his ass off. Spike wasn’t sure which would be worse.

He was so busy noticing all these things about Xander that he didn’t notice Xander noticing him. The first time it happened Spike was sure that he was imagining things. They were at the Bronze and he and Xander had reached for the same beer bottle. Hands met and Xander didn’t immediately pull his away. Instead he, maybe, had allowed his hand to stay on Spike’s just slightly longer than necessary. His eyes had met Spike’s and then slid away, a light flush on his face. Buffy had shown up then and Xander had moved his hand away. It all happened so fast that Spike figured he was losing his marbles. No way was Xander interested in him. He was Fangless, the joke, the vampire they had to take care of because he was too pathetic to stake. Love’s Bitch had never been more true. Xander was too good to ever want someone that had done the things Spike had done. A few nights later it happened again. They were patrolling with Buffy and had run into some fledges. Huge fight ensued and then one of the vampires had gotten in a lucky kick to Spike’s chest. Spike had stumbled back and into Xander. Xander had grabbed at Spike’s hips and just barely managed to keep them both upright. They had stood that way for long moments, Xander pressed against Spike’s back and Spike could have sworn he felt Xander get hard. Then they were attacked again and he’d had to turn his attention to the fight. Afterwards, Xander had come up to him and made sure he was all right. He’d never done that before. Xander had met his eyes for a brief moment and nodded before heading off with the Scoobies. Spike watched them go, puzzled. There had been the briefest hint of something on Xander’s face before he’d turned away. He’d walked home half elated at the thought he’d seen desire in Xander’s eyes and half-scared to death that he had imagined the whole thing.

Things slowly started to change between himself and Xander. They patrolled together, hung out at the Bronze together, and watched TV together. They could talk and they could also sit comfortably and not say anything at all. He’d thought things were fine. Then one day Xander had shown up and announced that he’d found an apartment. Spike had been in a state of near panic, thinking that he was being left behind or told to move on. Then Xander had shown him the place and told him to pick out whichever bedroom he wanted as his. As if it was a forgone conclusion that Spike was welcome wherever Xander was. That’s all it took. One minute he was deeply in lust with a hunky construction worker and the next he was head over heels in love with Xander.

Once they moved everything changed. When Spike would turn to watch Xander, he’d find Xander already watching him. There were shy glances and hidden touches and Spike amazed himself by not finding the whole flirting thing ’poofy’. He’d never done this before. This slow build up to something. He was just beginning to wonder if Xander was going to die of old age before anything else happened between them when-well something else happened between them. They were sitting companionably on the couch watching a comedy special. Xander was laughing at the comedian onstage and Spike had turned to look at him. He loved the look on Xander’s happy face. Xander had turned to make some comment and their gazes locked. Slowly, each giving the other plenty of time to stop, they leaned towards one another until their lips met. Hesitant at first, each learning the feel of the other, they kissed. Then Xander’s tongue had slid out and licked at Spike’s bottom lip. Spike had groaned and parted his lips, allowing Xander’s tongue to slip inside. Xander’s tongue caressed his and then slid over his teeth before flicking at the roof of Spike’s mouth. Xander had retreated only to slide back in again and their tongues tangled lazily together, teasing and tasting. When they’d pulled apart they were both panting. They’d spent several lazy hours on the couch doing nothing but kissing that first night.

After that it was like a dam had broken. Every minute alone involved stolen feverish kisses. Hands groped and became frantic at the restriction of clothing, but oddly, neither one of them made any move to do anything about that. Spike found himself in a state of permanent arousal and surprised himself by not being in hurry to force Xander to the next level. He wanted this thing with Xander to work and he wasn’t going to do anything to screw it up.

That had been three months ago, Spike believed that Xander was ready to move things forward, and it seemed fitting that it should be tonight. After all, if it weren’t for the Initiative chipping him a year ago, he and Xander wouldn’t be together. He smiled and picked up the phone. One call to Red and his plan would be set.

* * *

Xander turned the key in the lock, thrilled with this unexpected night off. He’d stopped by the Magic Box after work and found that there were no demons to hunt. The girls were planning a chick movie marathon and Giles had gone out of town on a buying trip for the store. Xander stepped into the apartment and froze. The only light came from candles placed around the room. Spike was standing near the window bathed in candle glow. He was utterly beautiful and Xander’s breath caught.

“Might want to close the door, luv. Don’t want the neighbors peeking in.”

Xander grinned sheepishly and closed the door. He waved a hand at the apartment.

“What’s all this? Not that I don’t like it but is this some special occasion that I forgot?”

Spike smiled and Xander’s heart flipped. Real, genuine, non-smirking smiles were rare from Spike and he loved them.

“We’ve been friends for months now, pet, and something more than for a while now. I like what we have here but I want more. I need more. And I think you do to. I want to be with you. I want to make love with my Xander tonight. Will you let me?”

Xander’s heart skipped a beat and then took several as if to make up for it. He dropped his keys on the table and slowly crossed the room to Spike. Spike pulled Xander to him and their mouths met in a gentle kiss. Spike pulled back and led Xander to the couch. Xander grinned. The couch had become a favorite make out spot. They sat side by side and Spike leaned in to kiss Xander again.

The first kisses were slow and sweet. Then Spike slid closer and rested his hands on Xander’s waist. Tongues met and Spike’s hands began to roam over Xander’s chest. He pinched lightly at cloth covered nipples and Xander moaned. Then Spike was sliding his hands up and down Xander’s arms and Xander found that surprisingly erotic. One of Spike’s hands slid up to cup the back of Xander’s head and pull him into a more forceful kiss. When they broke apart, Xander was breathless. Spike leaned in to pepper light kisses over Xander’s jaw, cheeks, eyes, and forehead. His tongue flicked out to trace a cheekbone and Xander shivered. Spike trailed his tongue along Xander’s jaw and up to his earlobe. He nibbled gently and then flicked his tongue into Xander’s ear and Xander melted.

“God, Spike, you know what that does to me.”

“Hmm. Yep. Makes you all tingly and shivery. I like it.”

Xander liked it too and squirmed when Spike licked his ear again. Then that wicked tongue was trailing back down his jaw and down his neck to his shoulder. Spike pulled the collar of Xander’s T-shirt aside and placed little kisses all along his shoulder and then over his throat. He mouthed a hot trail along Xander’s other shoulder and then moved back to nuzzle at his throat. He placed his lips at the juncture where neck met shoulder and sucked hard. Xander started.

“Spike, did you just give me a hickey?”

Spike chuckled against his skin and Xander decided he could live with going to work with a hickey. Spike leaned back and pulled Xander’s T from the waistband of his jeans. He slid the shirt off and tossed it onto the floor.

“Hmm. So much naked to Xander to kiss. Where to start?”

Spike obviously found his starting point because he latched onto one flat nipple and Xander nearly shot off the couch. Spike licked and nibbled until the little nub was hard and then licked a trail to Xander’s other nipple. He treated that one to the same erotic suckling then with a last bite moved on to Xander’s ribcage. He mouthed hot wet kisses along each rib on Xander’s right side, then did the same on the left. He moved down to nibble at Xander’s stomach before dipping his tongue into Xander’s navel. Spike moved back to nibble at Xander’s stomach, worrying a small patch of skin with his teeth.

“Spike, you aren’t trying to give me another hickey are you?”

“Hmmm. Maybe. Quiet now. ‘M concentrating. Wouldn’t want to miss any important bits, now would I?”

Xander leaned back and decided that Spike could cover him in hickeys if he wanted. As long as the vampire didn’t stop doing those incredible things with his mouth.

Spike didn’t. He leaned down to lick a trail along the waistband of Xander’s jeans before sliding to the floor. He removed Xander’s shoes and socks and then knelt between Xander’s thighs. He gave Xander a look that instantly made Xander glad he’d never given up his love of baggy jeans. His cock hardened painfully and lay thick along his lower belly. Spike eyed the swelling with interest before leaning up and licking along the waistband of Xander’s jeans again. Then he bent his head and mouthed the tip of Xander’s cock through his jeans.

“Spike!”

Xander’s hips arched off the couch and Spike placed his hands on Xander to keep him still. He bent his head and began nibbling the fly of Xander’s jeans, teasing Xander through the denim. Xander moaned and grabbed the back of the couch. He was dimly aware of Spike lowering his zipper and then his jeans were being tugged off, leaving him in nothing but his boxer shorts. Spike had intended to lick every inch of Xander from the top of his head to the tip of his toes, but the bulge in Xander’s boxers had him transfixed and there was nowhere else he wanted to play right now. He nibbled at Xander’s hipbones, then bit a trail down one lean thigh to the edge of Xander’s bright green boxers. He flicked a tongue under the cotton and tasted warm skin. He nibbled his way up the inside of Xander’s thigh, over his balls, and then on to the other thigh. He worked his way up until his mouth was just inches above Xander’s cock. He bent his head and mouthed a trail from the base of Xander’s erection to the tip.

Xander was moaning incoherently and had to fight not to force Spike to put his mouth on him. All the teasing they’d done over the last several months left him on the edge and he wasn’t sure if he could take much more.

“Spike, please, I can’t...I don’t...”

“Shh, pet. Won’t make you wait long. Promise.”

Spike bent his head once more and slid his tongue into the opening of Xander’s boxers. His tongue found warm hard flesh and he moaned. He licked the length of Xander’s cock several times before he decided he wanted more. He leaned back and grasped the waistband of Xander’s boxers.

Xander felt his boxers leave his hips and froze momentarily. He and Spike had teased and tormented every inch of each other bodies but they’d never been naked together. He was nervous and then felt stupid for being nervous. Soon he was completely naked.

Spike let his eyes roam every inch of Xander. The frankly admiring gaze banished the last of Xander’s nervousness. Spike placed his hands on Xander’s thighs and began caressing the warm flesh. He lowered his head and licked Xander’s cock again. Xander bucked his hips lightly and gasped when Spike’s mouth slid over his cock and took him in deep. For long minutes there was no sound in the apartment except for Xander’s harsh breathing. Spike took Xander’s cock to the back of his throat and sucked hard. Xander came with a hoarse cry, moaning in delight at the feel of Spike swallowing his come.

Spike gently slid Xander’s spent cock from his mouth and licked him clean. He stood and waited for sated brown eyes to find his. When he had Xander’s full attention, he stripped off his shirt and stood there in nothing but his jeans. He smiled at the arousal that flared in Xander’s eyes when Spike dropped his hand to his fly. Slowly he undid each button and then almost casually parted the panels of his jeans.

Xander’s mouth practically watered at the pale flesh revealed between the denim. Course dark hair covered Spike’s groin and Xander wanted more than anything to see what else was hidden in those jeans. Spike slid the jeans off his hips and let them fall before casually kicking them aside. He stood naked and proud and let Xander look his fill.

Xander got off the couch and came to stand in front of Spike. He let his hands wander over the pale flesh. “You’re so damn sexy, Spike.”

“Come to bed with me?”

Xander smiled at him and let Spike lead him to his bedroom. There were candles here, too and the covers on the bed had been pulled back. They climbed into bed and lay on their sides, facing one another. Xander found himself fascinated by Spike’s cock, which he’d felt many times but never actually seen. He reached down to stroke a hand lightly along the shaft, smiling when it twitched under his ministrations. He gently eased back the foreskin and rubbed his thumb over the glistening tip. Spike groaned.

“You keep doing that and I’m gonna come.” Spike warned.

“Good. Then we’ll be even. And we can start again.”

Xander wrapped one warm hand around Spike’s cock and began to stroke. He moved his hand steadily, tightening his grip on each upstroke and loosening it on each down stroke. Soon Spike was panting and his hips moved in rhythm with Xander’s hand. Brown eyes were locked on blue when Spike came with a throaty moan, covering Xander’s stroking hand.

They lay quietly, watching each other. Spike eventually noticed that Xander was rubbing warm circles on his thigh. He smiled.

“You’re all sticky.”

Xander grinned back. “Yeah and it’s all your fault.” He lowered his eyes for a minute and then looked back at Spike. “Want to shower with me?”

Naked showering wasn’t on Spike’s list of activities for tonight but the minute he got an image of Xander wet and glistening in the shower he revised his plan. He was out of the bed like a shot and pulling Xander towards the bathroom.

Spike wouldn’t let Xander turn on any lights so they showered by candlelight. They played under the hot water, taking turns soaping and shampooing each other, before rinsing off. Now clean, they merely stood under the hot spray, kissing and running their hands over wet flesh. They stayed in the shower until the water started to turn cold and then got out. They dried off and headed back to bed.

Once there, they lay side by side once again. Xander wiggled forward until they were pressed tightly together. They kissed softly at first and then with growing urgency as passion flared again. Spike slid a hand over until he could cup Xander’s butt and pull their groins in closer contact. Hard cocks slid together and they groaned. Spike pulled back to look at Xander.

“I want to be in you. Is that ok?”

Xander froze. Was he really ready to do this? He knew he could still stop this but did he want to? He’d never even thought of doing this with another guy until Spike but just lately it was all he _could_ think about. Xander nodded and Spike kissed him again. He rolled over to retrieve a tube of lube from the nightstand and then rolled back. Xander had moved onto his back and Spike settled himself between Xander’s thighs. He squeezed some lube on his fingers and then slid his hand down to lightly fondle Xander’s balls. He moved his hand further back and began gently caressing at Xander’s hole. He felt Xander tense.

“Sorry, just, you know, a little weird. Even though we‘ve done, well, stuff, you‘ve never actually touched...and I want you to. It‘s just...weird.”

“’S ok. Not gonna hurt you.”

“I know.”

Spike resumed his ministrations and felt Xander relax against him. He used his other hand to rub lightly at Xander’s thigh. He watched Xander’s eyes close and heard him start to make breathy little moans. Spike gently slid one finger inside Xander and began to work it slowly in and out, making Xander moan softly. Spike kept up the steady motion of his finger. Then on the next slide out he added another finger and worked both back in. He slid his other hand up Xander’s thigh and began stroking Xander’s cock. He moved the fingers he had inside Xander’s ass and searched for that one little spot inside.

“Spike!” Xander arched off the bed with a strangled moan.

Spike grinned and rubbed at the little nub again. “Like that, pet?”

“God yes. Don’t stop.”

Xander fisted his hands in the sheets and bucked his hips, wanting more of Spike’s hand on his cock, more of Spike’s fingers in his ass, just more everything. He moaned in disappointment when Spike’s hands left his body.

“’S ok, luv. Just want to be in you now.”

Spike quickly added lube to his dick and then moved into position. He put the head of his dick at Xander’s hole.

“Ready now?”

“Yes, Spike, please.” Xander could feel the blunt head of Spike’s cock pressing at him and he wanted it inside him.

Spike pushed forward slowly, carefully easing his way inside Xander. He kept rubbing soothingly at Xander’s thigh.

“God, Xander, you feel so good. So damn tight.”

Xander knew that Spike was trying to be careful, but he wanted Spike inside him and he wanted it now. He grabbed Spike’s hips and lifted his legs to wrap them around Spike’s waist. He brought his hips up at the same time that he pulled Spike’s hips toward him and they both gasped when Spike slid completely home. Xander lifted his face so he could look at Spike. He wiggled a little and gasped again when Spike’s cock shifted inside him.

“You’re inside me, Spike. Finally. Inside me.”

Xander’s voice was full of lust and wonder and Spike buried his head in his lover’s shoulder, fighting for some control. He was going to make this good for Xander if it killed him. He pulled out and then slid slowly back in. It took a few tries but then they were moving together, each thrust by Spike met by an answering thrust from Xander. Spike kept hitting that spot for Xander over and over and Xander’s breath began coming faster and faster. They rocked together, voices mingling in little whispered words of love and passion. Spike reached between their heaving bodies and grasped Xander’s swollen cock, stroking it the way he knew Xander liked. When he felt Xander reach the edge he rubbed his thumb lightly over the head of Xander’s cock. Xander cried out and came over their slapping bellies. His ass clenched hard around Spike’s shaft and the vampire let out a low groan. He buried himself deep inside Xander and let his climax wash over him.

When Spike stopped shaking, he eased himself from Xander and moved to lie beside his lover. His lover. Xander was finally his lover. He felt Xander snuggle up against him and pulled him closer. Xander rested a hand on Spike’s belly and smiled when the vampire brought one of his hands down to link it with Xander’s. Spike dropped a kiss onto Xander’s head.

“You okay, luv?”

“Mmm. Never better, Spike. That was amazing.”

“That it was.”

Xander was quiet for a minute then lifted his head to look at Spike. “Thank you. For this. For whatever brought this on.”

Spike smiled and kissed Xander. “Told you. Been wanting this. So have you. Seemed like we were both ready, is all.”

Xander laid his head back on Spike’s chest. He knew that there was more to it than that but he wasn’t going to push. Tonight had been wonderful and that was enough for him.

“So, you have anything else planned in your wild night of debauchery?”

Spike chuckled. “Well, a nap is probably in order, then a bite to eat. Gotta keep your strength up.” He rolled them so that Xander was on his back and Spike lay partially on top of him. “Some more naked showering and then I thought maybe you might want to make love to me this time.”

Xander’s eyes darkened with arousal and he flipped them so he was straddling Spike. He leaned down and kissed Spike. He leaned back so he could look at his lover and grinned. “Think we could skip everything but that last part?”

Spike laughed and pulled Xander’s head down. Just before their lips met he said “Sounds like a plan to me, luv.”


End file.
